Thursday, August 14, 2008

Fic: Five Things That Came Through the Rift Torchwood Didn't Destroy for the Good of Humanity

Pairing: Gen mostly, but with a wee bit of Jack/Ianto and a hint of Owen/OC.
Rating: PG-13 for a bit of innuendo.
Spoilers: For 2.13 - Exit Wounds
Summary: Not everything Torchwood deals with is dangerous.
Disclaimer: Torchwood is outside the government, beyond the UN and far, far away from being mine.

Five Things That Came Through the Rift Torchwood Didn't Destroy for the Good of Humanity

[ mood | productive ]

Labels: fic, torchwood

Liz wittered on at 2:51 PM | 0 comments | #

Saturday, August 02, 2008

del.icio.us, dark knight, deals, depeche mode, draught

1. Is it just me or does anyone else take a perverse pleasure in constant painstaking refinement of the organisation of their del.icio.us links?

2. The Dark Knight is excellent, though mostly about as much fun as being stabbed in the face. The female characters once again get short shrift and I was so very happy to find Origin Story, a fanfic by minim_calibre that she'd written in response to Jim Gordon's daughter (future BATGIRL for goodness sake) barely getting a look-in. Also, I like to imagine the Joker attends these:

3. The following is an annotated extract from an Amazon email I got the other day (I am probably far more amused by its unintentional accuracy than is strictly necessary):
It's funny because it's true

(Obviously Dean SHOULD have sold his soul on Demon eBay, that's been established (at least in fic), but failing that, perhaps Damnazon Marketplace?)

4. Depeche Mode are made of win covered in awesomesauce. Never Let Me Down Again is an entirely perfect slice of '80s new romantic/synthpop/electronica/wossname, and it's totally about Dean and Sam Winchester. Oh yes it is.

5. Why don't they sell ginger beer on draught in pubs? It's much nicer than that hop-based stuff.

[ mood | thoughtful ]
[ music | Depeche Mode - I Feel You ]

Labels: amazon, awful awful puns, batgirl, batman, dark knight, del.icio.us, depeche mode, fic, films, five things, lashings of ginger beer, links, supernatural, women

Liz wittered on at 9:22 PM | 0 comments | #

Saturday, July 26, 2008

In which I watch a Rob Schneider film and hurtle into an abyss of self loathing

Even though I've had an eminently respectable Werner Herzog film out on rental for ages now, last night for some reason I decided to watch Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo - which isn't just a bad film but a SEQUEL to a bad film. And it was so thunderingly, bizarrely horrible that once I'd started watching I SIMPLY COULDN'T STOP.

I have only myself to blame. I could have switched it off after the first two minutes when Deuce is impelled to visit his ex-pimp in Amsterdam because he's trying to lay low having inadvertantly caused a TERRIBLE CETACEAN DISASTER. Or a bit later when TJ the pimp is worried people will think he's gay because he keeps getting caught looking at DEAD MEN'S PENISES. Or when Deuce has to start whoring again in order to investigate the gigolo murders and takes out a woman whose mother worked at Chernobyl and who was born with a PENIS instead of a nose, and I'm assuming she has a little pair of FACIAL GONADS as well because, well, you can guess what happens when she sneezes. Or when another client of Deuce's turns out to be a woman with no larynx who is somehow able to geiser wine out of her TRACHEOSTOMY. Or when I discovered that Deuce's pretty Dutch love interest is played by a woman who is LITERALLY YOUNG ENOUGH to be Rob Schneider's DAUGHTER. Or when TJ drops some chips in a toilet but decides to eat them anyway and then a cat comes in and SAVAGES HIS BALLS.

BUT I DIDN'T SWITCH IT OFF.

I sat through every damn knob, tit and fart joke. Every gag about Asian men's penises being small (which is a stereotype I'd heard of but never actually seen deployed), or how funny it is when men get sexually assaulted by women (or by other men. In prison), or people accidentally eating SPUNK because someone just sneezed it into their soup. HA HA! And Oded Fehr was in it for all of two minutes - which is a ridiculously short amount of time for Oded Fehr to be in something - and most of that time he spent CHOKING. And then it did that thing that ALL American gross-out sex-comedies do, which is to have a completely incongruous sweetly conservative unsubtle message. Deuce is kind of a spod and probably a hopeless lover, but women like him because he TOTALLY ASKS THEM ABOUT THEIR DAY and is all nice to them and shit. And it's sweet and NOT AT ALL CREEPY that he carries his dead wife's prosthetic leg around with him and encourages his clients to get boob jobs.

And I sat there and I watched it and I watched it and I didn't watch the eminently respectable Werner Herzog film that I've had out on rental for AGES NOW and I marvelled at how much skill and time and effort had gone into making this HORRIBLE FILM and I hated Rob Schneider and I hated Adam Sandler but most of all I hated MYSELF.

[ mood | cynical ]
[ music | Kula Shaker - Sound of Drums

Labels: films, late night, stupidity, why oh why oh why

Liz wittered on at 12:09 PM | 0 comments | #

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Extreme snogging

This is just the best music video ever:

[ mood | happy ]

Labels: extreme snogging, music, of utter inconsequence, video

Liz wittered on at 11:06 PM | 0 comments | #

Saturday, July 05, 2008

Doctor Who 4x13 - Journey's End

My initial reactions went something like this:

(Minor spoilers and copious exclamation marks follow)

Yay Mickey! Yay Jackieeeee!

Yay Jack!

Yay Sarah Jane!

Yay Martha!

Yay Rose!

Yay Doctors!

YAY! DONNA!!! DOCTOR DONNA!!!

Yay "I can't tell you what I'm thinking right now!"

Yay Donna!

Yay Martha and Mickey joining Torchwood!

Yay Donna!

Yay Rose getting a (sort of) happy ending!

Yay Donna!

Nooooooooooo!!! DONNAAAAAAAAAA!!!

*fires up BBC iPlayer to watch again*